Dear neurodivergent entrepreneur,

The notion of being forced into anything can stir intense emotions. Reflecting on my traditional work environment days still brings simmering anger—continually forced to perform irrelevant, meaningless tasks alongside meeting after pointless meetings.

Even now, when someone pressures me into an activity, even one I might enjoy, I become overwhelmingly resentful. Yes, I can be a control freak, but this post isn't about that.

It's about forcing ourselves to rest, even when we don't want to and we're not tired.

Embracing Self-Enforced Rest (SER) for Energy Management

You don't need to be in constant productivity mode to cultivate a successful business. Neurotypical business advice often glorifies relentless hustle and grafting, but it's misleading.

I approach my work with dedication and strive for excellence yet I've realised that sacrificing my health isn't necessary—and you don't have to, either.

I've built a thriving and profitable business while working fewer than 30 hours a week, sometimes less, and many of my peers have done the same.

For women like me—perhaps like you—who find neurotypical work environments challenging or even unsafe, embracing self-employment offers a chance to earn a good income without compromising our wellbeing.

I want to share how Self-Enforced Rest (SER) has become my key to maintaining stability, particularly in managing my energy levels. For those new to this concept, SER can provide a vital reset for neurodivergent women in business, mitigating potential burnout and enhancing productivity.

For many years, I battled Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (CFS/ME) and Autistic Burnout, finding myself bedridden for prolonged periods. Paradoxically, these challenging experiences have become invaluable.

I've evolved into a sort of "energy wizard," finely tuned into my energy levels, aware of what drains them and what fills my tank. Monitoring these levels has become a non-negotiable commitment.

Implementing SER may sound simple and intuitive, but resting, even when not tired, presents a unique challenge—especially for those with ADHD who crave productivity and new ideas.

Recognizing The Need for Breaks

Understanding and responding to our needs for breaks is critical for maintaining a balanced life. Here’s what I've learned I need breaks from:

- Societal Expectations: Stepping away from external pressure is crucial.
- Energy from Others: Absorbing energy in social settings can be draining.
- Toxic Environments: Navigating traffic, supermarkets, and airports can be overstimulating.
- Physical Overstimulation: Heavy lifting or excessive exercise requires recovery.
- Work Hyperfocus: Breaking the cycle of constant productivity is vital. (read my blog post on this here)
- Digital Overload: Detaching from screens, especially phones, becomes necessary.

Sometimes, the most respite I need is just from the chaos within my own mind...

Proactive Energy Management

Maintaining an active lifestyle—one where grocery shopping or enjoying a meal with friends is manageable—requires a proactive approach. Rather than waiting for warning signals to respond, I act preemptively, a strategy that has transformed my life and helped prevent burnout.

On my health journey, I’ve realized that my challenges are common among my friends. We share a widespread issue: prioritizing everyone else's needs over ours leads to burnout and health struggles.

This shared experience underscores a systemic issue among women rooted in capitalism and patriarchy, perpetuating a never-ending sense of inadequacy. In my coaching career, every woman I've met wrestles with this - stuck in a cycle of "shoulds."

Insights from a Rest Survey

To gain insight into how others approach rest so I could find out more about people's behaviour, I surveyed six friends, asking, "Do you practice self-enforced rest to avoid future repercussions?"

Here’s what they shared:

- “I do, but I feel sad missing out on friends and human connection. I try to ride through the sadness, even when I can't cope.”

- “Rest wasn't a thing in my upbringing. It opposes the toxic work ethic instilled in me.”

- “Over the years, I anticipate trouble and rest by connecting with nature. It’s guilt-free and restorative.”

- “Resting is an idea I entertain, but I always convince myself there are more important things to do.”

Remarkably, none of them practised rest during the workday beyond lunch breaks.

Exploring Rest and Socialization

For me, resting always has to be on my own, but due to some of the initial comments I received, I posed another question, "Does rest need to be done alone?" 

A friend illuminated:

"Not necessarily, but it must be contained. I need full energy to socialize; otherwise, it depletes me. If I’m well, socializing brings joy, yet resting requires quiet and calm. One-on-one interactions can be comforting."

Having missed important events such as birthdays and holidays due to fatigue, I understand the sadness that can accompany rest. Yet, what’s truly sad is how deeply conditioned we've become against it.

Embracing SER can be transformative for all neurodivergent women and, certainly, if we're in business.

Let's recognise the peace and strength in rest.

Here's How To Incorporate A Self-Enforced Rest Strategy:

1. Schedule Regular Rest Periods

Dedicate specific times in your daily/weekly routine for self-enforced rest. Set reminders to ensure these breaks are consistent, allowing your mind and body to recharge.

2. Identify Energy Drainers

Make a list of activities and environments that deplete your energy. Strategize how to minimize exposure to these drainers, allowing more energy for what matters in your business.

3. Practice Mindful Disconnecting

Allocate time to disconnect from digital devices and overstimulating environments. Use this time for quiet reflection, nature walks, or engaging in activities that bring you joy and relaxation.

4. Set Boundaries

Clearly define and communicate your need for rest to colleagues, clients, and family. Protect this time by setting boundaries that prevent interruptions, ensuring your restful periods remain sacred and effective.

5. Cultivate a Supportive Network

Connect with fellow neurodivergent entrepreneurs or supportive peers. Share experiences and strategies for managing energy. Establish accountability partnerships to help each other stay aligned with your rest and self-care goals.

It's essential to recognize that prioritising self-enforced rest is not about abandoning ambition but about embracing a balanced approach that honours your neurodivergent needs and sensitivities.

Navigating the challenges of entrepreneurship while managing the unique demands of a neurodivergent life requires an intentional effort to step back, recharge, and refocus. By integrating self-enforced rest into your routine, you're not just preventing burnout but unlocking a more sustainable path to success and fulfilment in your business.

You deserve a business and lifestyle that aligns with your energy needs and allows you to thrive without constant sacrifice.